Transform Your Life

I love watching shows that feature tattoo coverups. I am quite amused by the horrible tattoos and the stories affiliated with them, but I am equally impressed by the creative talent of the tattoo artists. While that is enough to justify being entertained for a half hour, there’s another reason that I am so fascinated with tattoo coverup shows. It is nearly therapeutic to see representations of bad decisions transformed into meaningful works of art.

Each day we make decisions. Some are mundane like deciding what to wear or eat, who we’ll call or which street to take. Other decisions—those involving relationships, childrearing, education, and career choices—can cause anxiety. In either case, we deliberate knowing that some consequences of our decisions are irreversible and carry lifelong implications. However, that information is only useful to us today, as we consider future choices. Punishing ourselves over decisions we’ve already made is not useful, beneficial, nor wise. We simply need to start today.

You may have made questionable choices that have had long-term consequences. No matter the reasons for making those choices, your life is not too far gone. As long as you have tomorrow you have the ability to redirect. If you are willing, you can change your course. When you have the motivation and stamina needed to simply continue, you can change your life. Just as someone can walk into a tattoo parlor to cover an image that no longer depicts who s/he is, you can reconfigure the parts of your life that do not reflect who you’ve become. If an artist can take something permanent and unappealing and use its features to develop something aesthetically and emotionally pleasant, you can transform your life to more adequately reflect its complete and complex beauty.

Get Healthy

I have increased my focus on emotional health. I've grown to be much more interested in stability and peace of mind than keeping up appearances and living for others. This transformation hasn’t been easy or simple. Change is difficult and complicated. Understanding and support from others can also be elusive, but I made a promise to myself to get healthy.

Much of my childhood has been rooted in family. I knew from an early age that family was to be revered, honored, and appreciated. I fully understood the value my family placed on our relationships with one another so when I realized that what I needed to do to become emotionally healthy involved separation it caused some anxiety. My emotions were already mixed, but knowing the value of family made the decision excruciating to consider and nearly impossible to execute.

It has been—and still is—a process. I didn't get it right the first, second, third, or fifteenth time I tried. I screwed up and sent mixed signals repeatedly. I asserted myself and then guilt led me back. I made alternate plans during family gatherings only to convince myself that I could 'take it' and eventually gave in. After many tense visits, friends building me back up, and days trying to encourage myself back to normal, I had to ask, “Why are you forcing yourself to ‘take it?’ How is this helping you become healthy? How can you expect to walk in freedom without giving yourself a chance to be free?"

It was hard to choose peace over pacifying others. I deemed it unfair for me to be the one to separate when my actions didn't cause the strife. However, taking responsibility for my quality of life demands that I make tough choices and that I choose wisely. I made up my mind to become healthy and when I even think of faltering or giving in I always remind myself of the choice I made so that my actions reflect my clear choice instead of a fleeing feeling.

Not everyone will understand or support your choices—get healthy anyway. It will be difficult at times—get healthy anyway. You will have to encourage yourself sometimes—get healthy anyway. No matter the circumstances, no matter what it takes, give yourself permission to be free and get healthy anyway.

Try-Umph Travels: Home Again

I got off of the ship in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, and disembarked feeling many things. When I agreed to be a part of this voyage I knew the limitations. I knew I had to return home in December. I knew that whatever I saw, heard, and felt would end. I knew assimilating back into my life would be both difficult and comfortable. Even still, I didn’t feel ready. I wished I could take many things about my time on the ship with me or that I could bring my home life onto the ship.

When I disembarked I had to say goodbye to a lifestyle. Each day I had the privilege of being a short walk away from one of the most beautiful sights and peaceful experiences. There is something remarkable about viewing the ocean from the middle of the ocean. There are no buildings to obstruct your line of sight. There is no sand. You don’t need binoculars. You are right there. On the water, part of it. When it sways you sway. More importantly, if it’s still, you are still.

I don’t know what’s in my future. I don’t know what my next year looks like. All I know is that I’ve learned. I’ve grown. I’ve seen. I’ve felt. I’ve tasted. I’ve cried. I’ve laughed. I’ve laughed some more.

It was an impressive journey. It was fascinating to be at the mosque in Morocco during the call to prayer. Speaking to the young artist in Ghana as he proudly showed me his artwork inspired me to have a more youthful pride about my gift. Climbing Lion’s Head Mountain in South Africa taught me the benefits associated with completing a challenge. Relaxing on the beautiful beach of Mauritius with beautiful company reminded me of the importance of comfortable silence.

The complexities of India illustrated that I can and should accept my own complexities. Listening to a cover band in Malaysia showed me the impact that music has on creating a common experience across cultures. Learning to cross the busy streets of Vietnam illustrated that I cannot take for granted even the most basic life lessons. Standing on the Great Wall of China reminded me of the strength and fortitude we all have within us. Being personally escorted to a train by a friend’s mother in Japan showed me kindness in its most genuine form. Feeling the uncomfortably hot, dark sand under my feet on a Costa Rican beach allowed me to experience nature’s power. Sitting in a kayak off of an island in Honduras being soaked by a downpour prompted me to think of the humor that exists when we step outside of our usual.

All of these lessons are important and will remain with me. However, one of the most influential experiences didn’t occur in some exotic location. The time on the ship was just as valuable as the time I spent exploring off the ship. When I got off the ship in Florida I also had to say goodbye to people who were a part of my every day for a significant part of my life. Due to the extreme situations we faced our time together felt a lot longer than what the calendar revealed. When you are separated from all of your comforts and thrown into intense travel experiences that four month block of time expands into much more.

What was my favorite place? The place where I felt safe and secure enough to be vulnerable. What was my most memorable moment? Each moment that I trusted those around me enough to be authentic. You may think that place of safety and security or moments of trust should occur often, but on day one we were introduced as strangers. On day one we didn’t know one another’s names, let alone who would be welcome in or deserving of that space. On day one we set out to see the world, but we ended up seeing one other. By day 110, I’d developed safety, security, and trust with some amazing people, and that alone was well worth traveling around the world for.